12 Major Destroyers of Happiness

Happiness is often hard. But why is such a simple concept so difficult to achieve for most of us? Why do we spend most of our time so incredibly unhappy? For most people, the reasons causing unhappiness vary. However, here are 12 major destroyers of happiness that we’re all guilty of utilizing everyday. Sometimes we do these things unknowingly, but the first step towards happiness is contradicting the items on this list and making conscious efforts to stop these bad habits:

1 – Having unrealistic expectations for how things “should” be.

You’ll never be able to enjoy the now if you’re too focused on how things should be. Who sets those expectations anyway? Mostly we get ideas about how life should be from celebrities, T.V. shows, movies, media, etc. Your life isn’t a movie, but it’s still a life worth being happy about. It’s okay to have goals and strive for more, but don’t let achieving the goals get in the way of general joy.

2 – Comparing yourself to others.

Comparing ourselves to others – whether it’s looking at careers, weight/appearance, material items, houses, the way our kids behave – literally anything – comparing is no good at all. No good will come from it. Strive to be better than your yesterday self. Don’t worry about what others are up to in their lives.

3 – Seeing others on social media and thinking their lives are perfect.

We tend to only see the tip of the iceberg when looking at someone’s social media page. Most people only post their best moments. Don’t make the mistake of thinking these people never have bad moments. We all have good days and bad days, even the professional posters on social media.

4 – Listening and trusting every word the media says.

The media tends to be negative no matter what the subject matter is. Take everything with a hint of skepticism if you are interested in watching the news and daily updates from the media.

5 – Rushing through life.

Take time to stop and “smell the flowers.” When something makes you smile, stop and allow yourself to be happy for a moment instead of immediately moving on.

6 – Negative self-talk.

The worst bully we have is typically the voice inside our own heads. Don’t bully yourself and say mean things all day because you’ll never be able to enjoy anything in life.

7 – Negative friends.

Some people are walking lessons of how not to be. Learn from negative friends, but distance yourself. It’s hard to stay positive if you are around negativity all day.

8 – Regretting.

Let it go. Make peace with your demons. Nothing kills the mood like bad memories and harsh regrets. The past is over. Don’t let it ruin your now.

9 – Judging others.

Judging others is the action of those who are insecure with themselves. For some reason, it briefly makes us feel better when we criticize others. But in the long run, it only serves to fuel our own self-judgement. Stop judging others and you will learn to stop judging yourself.

10 – Failing to take good care of yourself.

Self care isn’t selfish – it’s vital. Take good care of your mind and body and you’ll open up the opportunity to be happy.

11 – Not making time for fun.

Fun is also vital. Break out of the work-eat-sleep cycle a couple times each week and have some genuine fun.

12 – Thinking we are alone in our struggles.

Everyone we meet is going through something difficult. The second we all realize this is the second we quit having pity parties and start connecting with others. Feeling alone is beyond damaging. A major way to work through issues is to see others living life and conquering their demons, too.


Thanks for reading this post. I hope you can let go of whatever might be destroying your happiness. Seek out professional help, too. Life is too short to be unhappy.

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