Solipsism and Restless Sleep

A bed so comfortable and safe, yet it can’t protect from the dreams that attack during the night from time to time. Haunted by the same person each time, nothing can stop the memories in the weakness of sleep.

Am I weak for being so tired? Time and energy are scarce. I tried. I did my best. Honestly. The sun continues to rise each morning following restless attempts at sleep. The sun never lets us down. The light always finds its way back to find us. Though, seeing the light depends greatly on what a person chooses to see. Some fail to feel it even submerged in its radiance. Others can picture it even through months of pure darkness.

The sun never leaves as long as you want her to stay. And that helps with the tiredness a little bit. The theory of Solipsism removes all stress. If everything is only in my head, why worry about the rest? Pretending the dark isn’t there won’t save you from it. Reading about nazis before bed brings dreams of dread. Change your beliefs to match the lifestyle you’d rather live.

I wish there were a monster under my bed or hiding in the dark of my closet. A real beast would be much simpler to silence than the horrors created in my head. Quantico is a lifetime away. I’m only 1 years from 28. We only get one shot and that dream is going to have to wait until my next life. I messed up and will have to find another way to save the world.

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